Our Precious Ethan Carter

Ethan Carter Lane was born on March 12, 2010, perfectly healthy except for a rare congenital heart defect (Supravalvular Aortic Stenosis and Supravalvular Pulmonic Stenosis) that has been passed down through the generations in my family. His sister, Emily (born November 22, 2004), has the same defect. She had two cardiac catheterizations with balloon angioplastys and open-heart surgery, all before the age of one. She is a happy, energetic little girl who has never been sickly (you would never even know she has a heart defect) and has an incredible future. Her little brother Ethan was expected to follow a similar course. He was a "normal baby"... he never looked or acted sick, never struggled, never let us know just how severe his heart defect really was. On June 4, 2010, at two months and three weeks of age, Ethan underwent his first procedure--- a cardiac catheterization with balloon angioplasty. Only they never started the actual procedure. When someone is put under general anesthesia, their blood pressure drops. When the doctors put our precious Ethan under, his heart could not handle the drop in blood pressure. He went into sudden, unexpected cardiac arrest, and teams of doctors tried everything they knew to save him. But, Jesus did the saving that day in His Own special way... and Ethan went to live forever in Heaven. This blog is simply one mother working through her grief and reconciling a Loving God with One Who allows us to suffer the loss of a child. It is also one mother wanting the world to know about her incredibly special son--- and the God Who loves him.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Ethan Is A Big Brother To...

a little sister!

Julia Carter Lane (named after that sweet big brother of hers!) will be here in less than 20 weeks, and we know Ethan is smiling down on us!

I know I haven't mentioned Julia on here since the post where I announced we are expecting... I have been giving some updates on facebook instead... and to be honest, doing a lot of just being quiet with all my thoughts and feelings.

I hope to post some of her very adorable ultrasound pictures soon, but I thought I should at least share that she is a girl, since we found out almost six weeks ago! :)

Emily kisses my belly and blows raspberries on it constantly, just like she did with Ethan. She is an incredible big sister, and she longs for Julia to get here so she can get her hands on her!

One of the million heartbreaking things about being without Ethan has been, and is, watching Emily suffer. I know that just as Julia will not be a replacement for Ethan in our eyes (there is no such thing as a replacement, because he is irreplacable!), she won't be in Emily's eyes, either... but she will bring us all so much joy, like Ethan brought--- and continues to bring--- us all so much joy.

I look forward to that day when Julia is placed in my arms, and I turn and place her in Emily's.

She will know just what to do, thanks to that little brother of hers! :)
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1 comment:

  1. AnonymousJuly 21, 2011 at 9:56 PM

    Another girl - how wonderful! I am so happy for you guys and I'm praying the next 20 weeks go by quickly and without any problems. Emily is so adorable and I bet she is super excited to meet her little sister. Praying daily for your whole family.

    Jodi Berndt
    www.alliesabnrmalappetite.blogspot.com

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