Our Precious Ethan Carter

Ethan Carter Lane was born on March 12, 2010, perfectly healthy except for a rare congenital heart defect (Supravalvular Aortic Stenosis and Supravalvular Pulmonic Stenosis) that has been passed down through the generations in my family. His sister, Emily (born November 22, 2004), has the same defect. She had two cardiac catheterizations with balloon angioplastys and open-heart surgery, all before the age of one. She is a happy, energetic little girl who has never been sickly (you would never even know she has a heart defect) and has an incredible future. Her little brother Ethan was expected to follow a similar course. He was a "normal baby"... he never looked or acted sick, never struggled, never let us know just how severe his heart defect really was. On June 4, 2010, at two months and three weeks of age, Ethan underwent his first procedure--- a cardiac catheterization with balloon angioplasty. Only they never started the actual procedure. When someone is put under general anesthesia, their blood pressure drops. When the doctors put our precious Ethan under, his heart could not handle the drop in blood pressure. He went into sudden, unexpected cardiac arrest, and teams of doctors tried everything they knew to save him. But, Jesus did the saving that day in His Own special way... and Ethan went to live forever in Heaven. This blog is simply one mother working through her grief and reconciling a Loving God with One Who allows us to suffer the loss of a child. It is also one mother wanting the world to know about her incredibly special son--- and the God Who loves him.

Friday, August 13, 2010

God Himself

It is raining outside... pouring, really.

My heart is heavy... yet, isn't it always?

Ethan's grave marker is here.

I can't believe I just wrote that.

I read about a family today who is taking their son home--- to die, maybe.

Where are you, God?

"Right where I've always been."

And it's true. I don't understand His ways, but He is still good.

We are grateful to be loved by so many as we walk through this valley of death--- of losing our precious son.

I only ask that you are patient with us.

We cannot rush our grief.

And I know it makes some people uncomfortable. But, God Himself grieved the death of His Son--- and always will.

And He will experience Restoration one day, too.

Come quickly, Lord Jesus.
Posted by at

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)