Our Precious Ethan Carter

Ethan Carter Lane was born on March 12, 2010, perfectly healthy except for a rare congenital heart defect (Supravalvular Aortic Stenosis and Supravalvular Pulmonic Stenosis) that has been passed down through the generations in my family. His sister, Emily (born November 22, 2004), has the same defect. She had two cardiac catheterizations with balloon angioplastys and open-heart surgery, all before the age of one. She is a happy, energetic little girl who has never been sickly (you would never even know she has a heart defect) and has an incredible future. Her little brother Ethan was expected to follow a similar course. He was a "normal baby"... he never looked or acted sick, never struggled, never let us know just how severe his heart defect really was. On June 4, 2010, at two months and three weeks of age, Ethan underwent his first procedure--- a cardiac catheterization with balloon angioplasty. Only they never started the actual procedure. When someone is put under general anesthesia, their blood pressure drops. When the doctors put our precious Ethan under, his heart could not handle the drop in blood pressure. He went into sudden, unexpected cardiac arrest, and teams of doctors tried everything they knew to save him. But, Jesus did the saving that day in His Own special way... and Ethan went to live forever in Heaven. This blog is simply one mother working through her grief and reconciling a Loving God with One Who allows us to suffer the loss of a child. It is also one mother wanting the world to know about her incredibly special son--- and the God Who loves him.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Precious Memories... Ethan on June 3, 2010, PART 1

Ethan's last full day with us was Thursday, June 3, 2010.

It was a day of precious memories... memories that will (and must) last for the rest of our lives...

We made the trip to Birmingham (his surgery would be at UAB the next morning), stopping for a late, leisurely lunch at the Olive Garden--- the same restaurant chain my husband and I went to on our first date, and the same one we have celebrated so many family occasions at... including this year's Mother's Day, less than a month before.

It was a special lunch... it felt right. Here Josh and I were with our two kids, taking turns holding "Baby 2" while giving "Baby 1" peaches from our tea, helping her with the kids' menu word search, and reminding her not to crawl under the table and to eat her mac-and-cheese, because "There will not be any more food for a while, so don't tell us you're hungry as soon as we get in the car..." It was family life, and we were grateful.

The servers cooed over our two children, and we ate it up, proud to be their parents. Ethan accidentally dipped his uncoordinated hand into my pasta as his head bobbed around, causing us to laugh. He wanted to be held, not put in his car seat beside the table, and we were perfectly happy to do the holding... and to give him lots and lots of kisses. As always, Mama wanted pictures... and thankfully, had Daddy take some.

We lingered at the table, just enjoying being a family. We would have stayed even longer, but we were anxious to get to the hotel so we could enjoy some family time at the pool before tucking our babies in at a decent hour (we would be up a lot of the night to let Ethan eat since he would not be allowed to after 4:00am, and we also had to be at UAB at 6:00am).

Here we are, just happy to be together (Emily's pout is a fake one, by the way!):



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